Thursday, September 20, 2007

Childfree Women and Sterilization

The women using sterilisation as a form of contraception
Once, it was a last resort for mothers desperate not to risk adding to their brood, but figures show elective sterilisation is becoming the contraception of choice for a generation of young women certain they don't ever want children.
. . .
The NHS refuses the majority of sterilisations to women aged under 30 or women who do not already have children.
. . .
"People may say I'm na've and wonder how I could possibly know that ten years down the line I won't suddenly want to have children.

"But the same people don't ask women my age who want to have kids if they think they will later regret having them and hanker after their old, child-free life. Elective sterilisation is still such a taboo and people don't seem able to accept it."

Although she had the approval of her GP, because Charlie was young and didn't have any children, she was forced - thanks to NHS standard practice - to attain the go-ahead from two other doctors at the London hospital where she had her operation.
. . .
Justine James, 28, an academic from Kent, was sterilised privately at a Marie Stopes clinic with 'no questions asked' when she was only 21. Seven years later, she is adamant that the decision has never come back to haunt her.

"For me, not wanting kids was like someone being gay or straight - it's inherent and it can't be changed. I don't even like children, I have no interest in them and I don't enjoy being around them, so why would I want any of my own?
. . .
Annily Campbell, author of Childfree And Sterilised, feels strongly that although women are becoming more confident about admitting they don't want children, society is less forthcoming.

"Having children and not having children should be equal choices, yet one has the blessing of society while the other meets with the greatest disapproval you can imagine."

Whether such disapproval is warranted remains to be seen. Let's hope that this so-called sterilisation generation know their own minds as well as they believe they do.

And there doesn't come a time when Charlie McCann rues the day she was sterilised at barely 30 and wishes she could head out, arm in arm with her own daughter, for a day's shopping.

Sigh . . why the obnoxious ending? The one that pretends that adoption does not exist, or that it is somehow less fulfilling? Although the journalist succumbed to the tradition of throwing in pronatalist claptrap, I applaud those women interviewed for the article.

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7 comments:

Unknown said...

While the women in the article should be commended, the author was extremely condescending. I get the distinct feeling that the author would like nothing more than for these women to regret their decision. It's disgusting.

Anonymous said...

Hi everyone,

I have a question regarding female sterilization. How painful is it. I am diabetic, which means there can be a problem with the healing process. can someone blog on this site all the info regarding female sterilization. Thanks so much

Jazmine said...

IMHO resentment and discrimination against Child-Free people is the last and worst socially acceptable bigotry in civilization today! My husband and I made the decision in our 20s not to have children. I selected female sterilization because we wanted me to stop taking birth control pills before I turned 30 on account of the medical risks associated with that situation.

I opted for tubal sterilization and it has been one of the BEST choices I have ever made! It isn't painful if you go the route of general anesthetic. I opted for a tubal cauterization so it was best for me to be unconscious when they did it. There are many forms of sterilization so please do your research first.
*Tubed "tied" have been known to become "un-tied".
*Tubes banded have been known to become "un-banded".
*With the cauterization method, (this creates special scar tissue in your fallopian tubes thus preventing eggs from traveling towards trouble.) my doc cauterized each tube twice in two separate places just for double the security. This was 27 years ago and so far, so good! Yes, I made my choice when I was 27 and today I am 53. I haven't one time for even one millisecond felt ANY regrets whatsoever.

And YES, we are still very happily married, now going on 34 years this December! Would we be half as happy with kids? We seriously do not believe we would be. Let's just say we love our life together and our tranquil, peaceful home just the way it is! :))

Anonymous said...

Hi

to the anonymous, and jazmine. The information you gave is good, but I still have doubts as I too an diabetic, and the pain and scarring worries me. Is there anyone who is dabetic too and had the sterilization procedure done, please blog.

Anonymous said...

Diabetics-- Essure has no cutting, no pain, not even anesthesia, is permanent and safe...and only takes something like 15 minutes. There is no recovery time.

I'm looking into getting it done as soon ad I have the money, it costs about $2750 but it'll be worth it.

tubal reversal said...

women use different methods for permanent birth control but after some time they want kid.it is old concept that it is impossible because now it is possible by tubal reversal surgery by which a woman can repair her tied tubes.

Always a Woman said...

Thank you, guys, for your comments. I am a childfree person. I hate when people judge me for not wanting kids (especially since I don't judge them for wanting kids). Then there are those who claim that I will change my mind in a few years. Let's see, I'm 26 right now and have always wanted to be married but I have never wanted to have kids. I honestly think that if I was to turn up pregnant after getting married, I would probably be so depressed that I would miscarry. I didn't even like playing with dolls and I don't like being around other people's kids (I still don't feel completely comfortable around my nephews). In fact, when I was a child myself, I didn't care for being around my peers because I felt they were too immature.

And I hate when people say things like, "What if your husband wants kids?" Um, don't people usually discuss such important things as whether or not they want children while they are DATING? If he isn't as adamant as me about never wanting to have kids ever, then I'm hightailing it out of that relationship. Even if he was as fine as a young Cary Grant (or Paul Newman), had the genteel manners of a southern man, and was as romantic as 100 Don Juans, I would get out of there if he wanted children.

Sorry for the rant. I just had to get that off my chest, but I really do think the commenters for some ideas for sterilization. Although I'm not even dating right now, as I get older and closer to meeting "the one" I need to start making arrangements now to take care of things.