Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Childless by (100% Regret-Free) Choice

MORE Magazine:
"Authors Scott, Fisher and May are all confident that society is turning a corner on childlessness. So are the other women I interviewed, almost all of whom said their parents and friends accepted their decision. Even the majority of Vincent Ciaccio’s friends were, if not fully supportive, at least tolerant of his decision. Ciaccio is a braver soul than I am—he had surgery to make it physically impossible for him to have a child. The vasectomy took place 10 years ago, when he was 23. (His family knew he was considering the procedure, then learned he had gone through with it when he appeared on Sally Jessy Raphael to discuss his decision, and Grandma happened to be watching and saw the caption under his head.) His reasoning: The procedure would be less invasive for him than a tubal ligation would be for his then-girlfriend (they've since married), and doctors tend to give men seeking sterilization less grief than they do women—a theory reinforced by the stories Ciaccio heard when he and his wife, a corporate lawyer, became spokes people for No Kidding!, an international social club that arranges get-togethers for childless people.

“For close to 10 years I spoke with people from all over the country and even the world,” Ciaccio says. “And I think in part the problem comes down to some doctors’ mindset of, You say you don’t want kids now but, you know, you’re going to change your mind because all women want kids. So I’m not going to perform this procedure because I know you better than you know you.’ ”

Though his wife is still active in No Kidding!, Ciaccio bowed out in order to concentrate on his PhD thesis at Rutgers University. The topic: men who don't want children, a group he feels has been underresearched. "
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1 comment:

Storm Bunny said...

It might not mean much to many, but it is interesting how Childfree folks are seen as "evil" precisely now, when the rates of childhood poverty are going up.


Certainly, in face of these numbers, in face of current social realities, not only I don't regret remaining Childfree, but horrify me how is there people selfish enough to put children to this ordeal, to struggle to try and find a way to survive only to have someone in their elderly days to take them over as an added burden to all their other problems.

We are not selfish, we are considerate!